Seth’s chestnuts from tonight

(From before dinner): “If you behave at dinner, I’ll give you candy.”

(After dinner, during an altercation with Nora): “Nora! Go to your room!”

(At bedtime, after being warned not to talk to his brother who shares the room): “I can’t control my talking.”

More travel!

After spending the weekend in Madrid, I left Monday afternoon for another trip – this time to the Netherlands. I’ve initiated a work collaboration with a colleague there, and we decided to get together for a few days for an intensive work session. In addition, I was invited to give a talk at a university there that is home to one of the world’s leading institutes for research in mathematics education.

I am writing this entry while on the plane back from the Netherlands. I really like the Netherlands. There is so much to appreciate – the country is socially liberal, environmentally responsible, amazingly bike friendly, and full of sincere and generous people speak English! I had a really great time. I tried to ‘go Dutch’ as much as possible, in that even though the weather wasn’t great (rain sprinkles most of the time), I borrowed a bike from the hotel and biked to/from the university from the hotel and to/from where we ate dinner each night. 

Although I have spent time in Amsterdam (which I like), this time I was in Utrecht. It was relatively small, full of canals and beautiful old brownstone-type homes. And of course, bikes. It is difficult to accurate estimate the number of bikes that are on the bike roads and locked in bike racks everywhere – there are just so many. In front of the one university building where I was working, there were easily 200 bikes parked. And at the central train station in Utrecht, I would estimate that there were easily 2,000 bikes parked – no kidding. The Dutch have invented new technologies for biking that seem to be unrivaled elsewhere. All bikes have a built in rear-wheel lock – you stick the key in and turn it, and the rear wheel is locked in position. (Most people also use a secondary lock that is more like US bike locks.) There are amazing bike racks – double and triple decker to hold lots of bikes. (At the train station, the bike racks were sort of like airport parking garages – with different levels and labels so that you could remember where you parked your bike.) There are bikes that hold people or children in front and/or in back. There are dedicated roads, bridges, and traffic lights for bikes. Each day as I biked to the university, I would see all sorts of people arrangements on bikes – college students riding two to a bike, a parent biking his kids to school – somehow squeezing 3 small kids on his bike. There are lots more bikes than there are cars, so the cars basically yield to the bikes. As a result (and also because the countryside is completely flat), no one where bike helmets. I didn’t see any car vs. bike confrontations; the biggest danger is bike vs. bike. When you cross the street on foot, you have to look both ways to cross the bike road, then look again for the car road – and the bike crossing is much more hazardous.

I also did my usual grocery store tourism, which I like to do everywhere. I enjoy walking through grocery stores in other countries to see what people buy and eat. My favorite new food from the Netherlands was stoopwaffles, which are sort of like waffle caramel cookies - they are really great. Of course I saw and ate lots of great cheese. I learned that Gouda, Edam, etc. are just cities in the Netherlands, so there really isn’t a such thing as “Gouda cheese” in the Netherlands (because lots of different kinds of cheese would be called Gouda cheese, since they are all from the town of Gouda.) I also learned that apparently what we call “Smoked Gouda” cheese (which is one of our favorites) is actually not smoked cheese at all but just “old” Gouda. Apparently smoked cheese is a completely different thing – the grocery store that I was in did not have it. But “old” Gouda cheese is great and is exactly what we tend to buy under the label of “smoked” Gouda.

And last but not least, the main airport in the Netherlands (Schiphol) is also one of my favorites. As shopping goes, there is a great variety (as opposed to the same duty free store and the same bookstore, just repeated every few gates). There are also several good food-court-type restaurants. It is well signed and easy to get around. And there is free Internet for an hour or so. It is easy to get in and out of the airport – a main and huge train station is connected to the airport, with even more shops near the train platforms.

Overall, it was a wonderful and quite full 3 days in Utrecht – the Netherlands is right up there on my list of favorite places in Europe. Now I’m home in Madrid with no travels for about 1.5 weeks, and then I’m going to the north coast of Spain to give a talk at a university up there and hopefully to explore a bit.

My trip to Moscow

I’ve been a bit absent on the blog recently – I’m thankful that Heather has been much more on top of things. While last semester felt quite relaxing (very sabbatical-ish), I (by my own design/fault) have been much more busy since the beginning of 2012.

One of the projects that has been taking up a decent amount of time is related to studying math and science secondary teacher education in other countries. I’ve been peripherally part of a group that seeks to make cross-cultural comparisons about math/science teacher education for several years, but only now has there been a need to do any work as part of the project. (I guess it doesn’t help that I volunteered to be in charge of some aspects of the work...)

But one of the perks of this project is the opportunity to do some travel. And last week was a rather significant perk – I had a work trip to Moscow for the better part of a week. This was my first trip to Moscow, and I was very excited. I was traveling as part of an official US delegation – sort of like I was part of the US government (specially the US Department of Education). (The #2 person in the US Department of Education was also part of this delegation – who is a very nice down-to-earth guy.)

The first step in traveling to Russia was getting a visa. Given our experiences with getting a Spanish visa (see earlier blog posts), I was braced for the worst. Had I been in the US, the US State Department would have handled/facilitated my visa application for me. But since I was in Spain, I had to do things myself. This included navigating the website of the Russian Embassy in Spanish to make an appointment and going downtown to the Russian Embassy with (what I hoped was the) necessary paperwork. Upon my first visit, the Russians were not able to find my name on the list of official of attendees to the meeting and thus they turned me away. A few calls to the State Department in DC and another appointment later (and with only a couple of days to spare), I was issued a visa. 

On the whole, it seemed a bit surreal to be traveling to Moscow – I guess my teenage memories of the Soviet Union and the Reagan-era remnants of the Cold War were pretty strong. It didn’t help that I received repeated and dire warnings from the US Government about precautions I should take with my electronics while traveling to Russia. These included leaving electronics at home if at all possible and not using any of my normal passwords or email accounts (for me, traveling without electronics was not possible – I needed to travel with my computer for work and my iPhone for, well, I just needed it, although I did bring my ‘spare’ computer, on which I deleted all personal information and documents, updated my virus protection, and changed all of my passwords to be super-duper-strong). Instead, I was to create a temporary email account (e.g., a new gmail account) and only use it during my travels. The US government delegation members were not allowed to bring computers but instead were issued new computers and phones by the US Embassy in Moscow upon arrival; these phones and computers were subsequently wiped after the conference ended. The Harvard computer security folks that I spoke to felt that these precautions were a bit over the top and alarmist – who knows. But it is noteworthy that, just a couple of days after my return to Spain, the following article appeared in the New York Times, suggesting that these concerns were perhaps justified.

Read the article

(I haven’t noticed anything weird upon my return to indicate that my electronics were somehow compromised, but who knows...)

There were two other factors that had the potential to impact the trip. The first was the weather. Europe was/is in the midst of a pretty extreme cold snap. In Moscow the day before I arrived, the low was -10 (°F). Even if I weren’t used to the relatively warmth in Madrid, this was COLD! And second, Russia is in the midst of political upheaval right now. Elections are coming and there are demonstrations frequently. The day before my arrival, there was a huge demonstration in Red Square. So it was shaping up to be an interesting trip!

I took an evening flight, through Munich, and landed at Moscow’s DME airport at 3:30 am. Taking the evening flight somewhat lessened the time that I was away from Madrid, thus slightly reducing the number of hours that Heather had to solo parent. In addition, arriving in the middle of the night was a way to minimize the impact of traffic on my travels in Moscow.

As I had been warned, and it is very true, traffic in Moscow is a complete nightmare. During the communist era, the government had tremendous control over all aspects of Muscovite’s lives. The government knew exactly how many people lived in Moscow (in the city, in different sections of the city, in the surrounding areas) and exactly how many cars needed to be on the roads. The highway system was built with these precise figures in mind – the government kept the number of cars to a minimum, only allowing as many cars to be made, bought, and sold as the roads could handle. But now that things have relaxed quite a bit, the population and the number of cars in Moscow has exploded and continues to grow at a fast rate. This means that most roads, most of the time, are bumper to bumper. The DME airport is about 30 km from downtown Moscow (about 19 miles). It routinely takes about 2 hours by taxi to cover this distance. By arriving in the middle of the night, my taxi ride from the airport to hotel was very smooth and took only about 45 minutes.

The conference itself was not especially exciting, although I did enjoy interesting conversations about math education and math teacher education with old and new friends from Singapore, Thailand, Korea, and China. In addition, my presentations seemed to be well-received.

Because of the cold, I wasn’t able to do as much sightseeing as I would have in the summer. But I still got to see some amazing sights, particularly the Red Square area (the onion-domed St. Basil’s Cathedral is really stunning in person – much smaller than I thought it would be). I also went to the Pushkin Museum of Fine Arts – at least the section that had the impressionist paintings. This museum has quite an amazing collection of impressionist works, all displayed rather plainly and without much fanfare. For example, there is a beautiful Picasso there that recently went on tour. I saw it when it was at the Prado in Madrid, and the Prado made a big deal of it – sort of a special one painting exhibition, complete with special posters and signs, etc. But in Moscow, it was just one of a handful of Picassos on a rather plain wall. There were also a handful of Van Goghs that I don’t think I’ve seen in person that were great.

Because I didn’t do a ton of sightseeing, I tried to soak up the culture in other ways. For example, riding the subway was a very interesting experience. The Moscow subway stations are really beautiful fancy buildings, ornately decorated with fancy trim on the walls, columns, sculpture, etc. Imagine the nicest old parts of an old train station such as Grand Central or Union Station, but in every single subway station. Navigating the subway was challenging, since all of the signs were written in Cyrillic. I also went to an open-air market that sold all sorts of trinkets and souvenirs. I resisted the urge to buy one of those cool furry Russian hats but did buy each of the kids their own little nesting doll.

I also had some wonderful meals. I had borscht just about every night. This was my first experience with borscht, and I loved it. Not long ago, I used to say that the only foods that I really didn’t like were beets and sweet pickles. With respect to beets, I have no memory of trying and not liking them, but I just didn’t eat them. But while living in Michigan, I ate fresh roasted beets and realized that beets were very yummy. I’ve since been a beet lover but have never tried borscht. The borscht I had in Moscow wasn’t really beet-y; it was a rich beef broth with some thinly sliced beets. I’d like to try to make it one day in my kitchen. I also had very good stroganoff, a dish whose name I can’t recall but is basically meatballs inside dumpling and is eaten in a light chicken broth soup. I had very good brown bread, especially bread with these relatively large and very strong caraway (I think) seeds. I had several different kinds of other soups that were great – Russians seem to like to eat lots of different kinds of soups.

And of course, I had lots of vodka. I was never a big fan of vodka. But I had vodka that was served ice cold and was extremely smooth – it was great. I went the relatively cheap vodkas as well – and they were still nice. Interestingly, I noticed at several restaurants that, instead of ordering a bottle of wine, tables would order a bottle of vodka. The waiters would bring the bottle of vodka and one of those wine chiller buckets, and they would put the vodka in the wine chiller. The calculus of ordering a bottle of vodka just didn’t add up. I usually was out to eat with 2 or 3 other people. Unlike a bottle of wine (4 glasses per bottle), there are about 10 Russian-sized shots of vodka in a bottle. I didn’t think we could handle that much vodka!

I celebrated my 46th birthday during my trip to Moscow. It was a fairly ordinary day, with meetings and presentations at the conference. I was able to have a nice workout at the hotel fitness center and a nice dinner with colleagues (including the singing of “Happy Birthday” in English by representatives from the US, Korea, and Russia.

For the same reasons that I chose to arrive in Moscow in the middle of the night, I also left at a similarly ridiculous hour (my flight left at about 6 am). Because of worries about traffic (even in the middle of the night), the shuttle wanted to pick me up at 1:30 am. I got a couple of hours sleep before I had to get up and go to the airport. The taxi ride again took about 45 minutes. My flights home went smoothly and I arrived back in Madrid at about noon local time. Overall, it was a really wonderful and special trip!

The Rube Goldberg machine

So we ended tonight's '80s dance party with the kids' favorite music video, the OK Go Rube Goldberg machine (OK, yes, it's not from the '80s, but they love it). They spent the rest of the evening discussing physics and making a Rube Goldberg machine out of household toys. Here's the product:




[p.s. any recommendations for a new camera welcome!]

Alcobendas, our home

We took some photos of Alcobendas around our apartment and then made a collage of them.

Some cultural observations

So it’s been awhile since I’ve talked about anything but our kids. I apologize. Here’s some cultural tidbits from the last couple weeks.

Denied. Some of you might remember my previous posts, in which I described the bread-store-owning brothers whom I fear. I crave their bread. They are very particular about to whom and how they sell their bread. This makes for some tense exchanges.

So I walk into the store yesterday, and there’s a little scrum of people waiting at the counter. Up being served is an adorable senior citizen – dyed red hair, cane, bird-like carriage, the works. As I walked in, she was ordering something. The response from bread brother #2? “Listen. TODAY we do not have blah blah blah. [More rapid-fire Spanish that I don’t understand]. NEXT IN LINE. YOU. Two gallegas?”

At this point, the woman in question turned to me with an expression of disbelief and proceeded to say something along the lines of “Can you believe this guy?” – but of course in rapid Spanish that I couldn’t understand. I didn’t have the time to answer her because the bread guy was actually pointing at me – my usual order is two gallegas. Alas yesterday, I only needed one (Jon in Moscow), but I was too terrified by what had just transpired to correct him. So now we have a huge loaf of gallega in the freezer.

Free stuff. So at least among the small shops up in Alcobendas, there’s a tradition of giving out free stuff. Buy $13 worth of fruit? Here, have some gum. Don’t want gum? Have some eggs instead. The bread guys, bless their hearts, often sneak little breadsticks or lollipops for the kids into our bag. And if you walk into any store with a screaming toddler, or even sometimes just a regular toddler, that toddler is going to get free food or a toy.

Interestingly enough, the free stuff doesn’t come with McDonald’s-type happy-happy-happy-meal attitude on the part of store owners and staff. You can find lots of fake excitement about customers here in Madrid, but it’s mainly at the mall or chain restaurants. More typically in local stores you get matter-of-fact service, or in some cases (like the bartender at the brothers’ bakery), a slightly aggrieved look when you order.

And yes, I said bartender at the bakery. The sometimes odd combinations of things for sale in any given establishment is for another blog post.

Letter paper. So I had to write a letter to an elderly aunt last weekend. Lacking the foresight to have brought note paper to Spain, I set out to find some in our little neighborhood. I already knew, from similar trips to our local grocery store/Target, that there was no letter paper to be found there, even though there was a fully stocked envelope center. So I walked around to a few local “papelerias” (paper-ias) and asked, best I could, for letter paper (“papel para escribir cartas.”) The first place, none. The second place, still none. I asked where I could find some, and the owner told me that they just don’t carry that sort of thing anymore, given that everyone uses email. He then tried to sell me some construction paper, but I demurred, wondering what the elderly aunt (whom I’ve never met) would think if a letter arrived from a 40-something woman on paper looking like it belongs in an elementary school project. To solve the situation, I ended up buying a hideous (kittens) and hideously expensive ($3.00) greeting card for the occasion.

Smoking. Smoking is super-common here in Spain—lots of old and young people of every social class do it. Except, I’ve realized, women of a certain age. Spain friends – was it considered gauche for women to smoke, circa 1960-1970? That would be my guess, because it’s very rare to see a woman over 50 lighting up.

Car safety. I’ve been doing morning drop-offs this week while Jon’s been in Moscow. This has allowed me to peer into many, many family cars as they wend their way to school, and I have this to report: the variance in car safety for the under-12 crowd is very, very wide here. In some cases, kids are strapped into what is practically a 270-degree carseat. In other cases, kids that look to be around 5 are bopping around in the passenger seat while their toddler siblings turn somersaults in the back. Perhaps this occurs because the road to/from school is a parking lot most mornings – nobody’s going anywhere fast, so the risk of serious accident is low. Or maybe this is the “free-range” (in a car) movement a la Spain.

Nora's day

Today I got a goal in futbol, which was really exciting because it’s the first time I’ve gotten eliminated second in “Eliminato” and it’s my first goal. We have soccer fields here that are pavement, which are dangerous. Yesterday when we were playing on one of the fields I got hit in the face by a ball, so now my lip and eye hurt. A lot.

I have a math exam on Monday about decimal numbers, which we’ve been studying for two weeks now. Which is not average, that’s shorter than average, because average is like 3 or 4 weeks. We’re studying operations with decimal, which means addition and subtraction. But the unit that we’re on is like two units in one. It has addition and subtraction with decimals AND money, which is the Euro because we’re in Spain. I think the Euro is going to be easy. Daddy came back from Russia with Rubles (and a wooden stacking doll!) and like 3,000 Rubles equals $100. That would be harder to do decimal operations with.

While Daddy was gone, Mommie said that I had been helping with Seth a lot, so she’s commuting my ban on Bella. I called them today and they’re available tomorrow. I saw Cleo on an excursion from school on Tuesday, and I think she’s not sick anymore.

The excursion was about nature, because we were going to the Aula a Naturaleza. She explained to us in Spanish but I did understand. And about the plants that were there. There was an Indian garden, and lots of cypresses, and an invernadero, which is all tropical plants. And a Bonzai museum.

Seth's day

Seth came home from school triumphantly wielding the cap to a magic marker. Note there’s no shortage of caps in our house – I don’t know why the pride in the capture of this one. After reporting that “Reina take away my other one” [no doubt Reina meant to get this one as well] he proceeded to show me that he can use the marker cap as chapstick/lip gloss as well as wave it around on his fingers. The marker cap went with him everywhere until it was time for bed.

Here’s what ensued at bedtime:

Mommie: Seth, you need to put away the marker cap, it’s time to snuggle down.

Seth: No! [Wails]

Mommie: How about leaving it right here on the bedside table, so you can get it in the morning?

Seth: [calmly puts the marker cap down on the bedside table] Fine. I’ll grab it when you leave.

Mommie: OK, it’s mine now then.

[Tantrum ensues, during which time I try to explain I could be arrested for letting my 3-year-old go to sleep sucking on a marker cap. We finally compromise on me leaving it on the breakfast table]

Seth: OK. You put it on the breakfast table. But don’t use it. I don’t want you to use it.

Mommie: I have no interest in using your marker cap.

Seth: Why not?

Nathan's comments

When we were playing soccer it was out of bounds, I was going to kick it and when I kicked it, it just went into the goal.

Nora's day

Today I played futbol, and it went a little better than I thought it was going to be because the boys were cheering me on. They usually don’t, but I think they started to realize that I’m a bit better than they thought I was.

We have a science exam tomorrow and it’s about the planets and climate.

Today we didn’t have gymnastics but Mom had me stay in the gym anyway. I did my homework on the pile of mats and it was super-high and fun. Some guys from the ESO (high school) started playing soccer and Andy had to come and say “sshh.” I realized later that they were part of the Maccabi soccer team. And me and a person from third grade were playing futbol, and we accidentally kicked it in the playing area, and the guy who was coaching said we couldn’t play.

While the Cat's away

Jon is in Moscow, helping represent the US education world at an APEC conference. He and Nora normally share a room (she for sleeping, he for working at the desk); when he left, he provided very strict instructions on how to maintain his half of the room. As many of you know, Jon is very tidy and neat.

Nora listened to the lecture and behaved accordingly. Her Pollies did not. Here's what happened within 24 hours of his departure:

First, a Polly scaled his lamp and started the party by swinging with some mardi gras beads.

Then two Pollies quickly moved onto his scanner/printer for a fashion show.

Twin Pollies having pool time.

Next, a Polly was spotted reclining on the wireless router.


Finally, at around midnight, the party wound down. Here's a Polly brushing her teeth.

Nathan's comment on this whole escapade: "I'm friends with the Cat. I don't want the Cat mad at me. I'm outta here."

From Nora

I suppose that I had a good day. But super cold. Last night we saw the Real Madrid game at the Internet Café. We stayed the whole game and we got back at 10:00. The Real Madrid won. I ran all the way home and so I was SUPER-DUPER TIRED. When I looked at Mommie's note on my post, I literally screamed that she was going to shorten my ban! Woo-hoo! But I still won't be able to go there because Cleo is sick (boo; and poor Cleo). A few months ago I saw Bella, Flo, and Cleo walking home from school. Their uniforms were cool. It was a Wednesday or Friday, I don't remember. I'm giving up on buzzing her because her buzzer doesn't work. But Eduardo is fixing it (I think). Nathan status: At football, in the freezing cold. We have drafty windows so it is freezing cold inside too. The wind is about 25 miles per hour. I'm NOT going downstairs! Brr! But I never thought it would get this cold. AHHH! But it doesn't snow (WAA! I want snow!) It is not as cold as Boston last winter (NOOO!!! It's maybe 10 to 15 degrees higher, without wind.) But still my feet are freezing. So I'm going to be putting on my wool socks soon. I'm starting to like school more. In gym we have to run 3 laps around the whole school, which is almost 1 mile or maybe 0.5 of a mile. In math we're learning about números decimales. We have a test on the 13th. In science we are learning about climates and planets. My favorite planet is Uranus. In Art we are learning about symmetry. We were (past) learning about Van Gogh. In Art the topics change per semester. This in long-hand is 3 pages!

The wind

Being in Madrid for the past three days has made me understand how settlers on the U.S. plains could be actually driven crazy by winter winds. Here we've had 20+ MPH winds:

A) Howling
B) Rattling windows, doors, and the stuff on the roof
C) Keeping us (and our three children) trapped inside the house (it's freezing too!)
D) Making my running route not only be uphill but into the wind

And it never seems to stop! Luckily kids have been amused by indoor activities and trips to the store.

Nora's comments

The last few days I’ve seen two plays, done an exam, and called Bella just to hear that she can’t play. The play was about the Maharal de Praga (I don’t know who he is completely, all I know is that he was a person). The sixth graders performed it. There was a golem whose costume was made of sand (ha ha :)). The second wasn’t a real play; it was the high school (or ESO) talking about the same theme. But there was games too they were in Spanish so I didn’t entirely understand. The third graders (Lavan and Cajol) and fourth graders went to the high school at the same time as the fourth and kindergarten.

The exam was of English. It was actually two exams in one because it was on Friday and on Fridays we have a verb test. My Spanish teacher in school (Carmen, she is also my math teacher) told me to go with her after I finished my exam. But since I didn’t have time I didn’t go. We have a lengua (Spanish language) exam on Monday.

It turns out Bella can’t come over because Cleo is sick. Also, I’m prohibited to go over there or have any dessert until February 28^th (although Mommie is thinking of commuting the sentence). Bella just moved to a bigger apartment but the same urbanicization. She has a Wii, and iPod Touch, and a huge house, and so when I go over there I’m always late coming back. And that’s how I got my ban of dessert and going over there. But it’s entirely my fault because I can’t keep track of time and Mom has to call.

Recent updates

Happy groundhog’s day! Except, I don’t know whether there’s a day for groundhogs, or even any groundhogs, here in Spain. If there were, the hog would’ve seen its shadow but subsequently have been knocked flat on its tucchus by the strong (20 mph) cold (35 degree) winds blowing off the mountains. Although this weather is about to feel like Florida’s to Jon, who is next week headed to Moscow, where the highs some days are predicted to be zero. Zero farenheit, that is.

There are no major events to report this week, only minor child-related tales and a question. In no particular order…

1) As noted on Facebook and predicted in a previous blog post, we’re in the middle of full toddler bedtime rebellion. After discovering in December that he can get out of bed by himself, Seth’s become increasingly likely to peek his head of his room to report things like “I can’t find my phone,” “I forgot my tiny money,” and my personal favorite, “my light is on” (because he turned it on and can’t get it back off). This joy extends to naps, too, which are becoming scarce. Jon and I did learn from going through the exact same stage with child #1 and #2, and now have a policy of putting #3 back to bed only once per evening – after that, he’s on his own. This seems to be deterring some of the behavior, at least temporarily. However, you should look next week for the post titled “I’m writing this while holding the door shut on a screaming toddler to trap him in his room at bedtime.”

2) Perhaps related to issue #1, Seth is now the proud Starhill record-holder for longest temper tantrum. This feat was achieved today by screaming for 30 minutes about which parent should wipe his butt (Mommie, of course) and then, immediately thereafter, for another 60 about washing his hands after using the potty and before eating snack.

Being child #3, Seth’s comparative disadvantage is that his temper tantrums actually give Mommie a chance to spend quality time with the older children. During the bathroom portion of the tantrum, for instance, we simply closed the door (muffling the noise) and I got to supervise Nora’s math homework, help Nathan read a book in Spanish, and also prepare to head out the door to swimming. So from my perspective, tantrums actually work out very well for almost everyone involved.

Seth’s other comparative disadvantage is that we now have an iPad, bought in a moment of holiday recklessness (and frustration over the millions of not-intuitive buttons on the Kindle). This enabled Daddy to sit through Tantrum Part II while reading the New York Times (the big kids and I had left for swimming).

3) While I’m on the topic (well, not exactly on the topic; I’m free-association ranting now, as you can probably tell), let me take this opportunity to comment on a recent thread on the Arlington parents’ list re: toddlers and airplanes. Every few months, there’s a parent who writes in and asks “I’m going on a long airplane ride soon with my X-year-old. What can I do to make this experience easier?” There’s always some Mother Theresa-type (actually, usually several) who write in with the creative things they stow away in their backpack for cross-country trips: books, finger puppets, stickers, play-doh, stamps, card games, masking tape, magnets.

I pack one thing: My iPhone.

I did try, once upon a time, to be more conscientious about not polluting my children’s minds during FIVE-HOUR cross-country flights. I packed all these suggested items – and discovered that they occupied my child for approximately 5 minutes each. That means I’d require about 60 toys to keep my child occupied for the better portion of a flight. The weight/space implications of that statement are in conflict with my computer, which requires a large amount of my backpack. And servicing my child by prying things out of my backpack every 5 minutes conflicts with my work addiction on flights. After all, it’s the only time you’re not being emailed by everyone in the universe.

iPhones have gotten a lot better since the early days, when you could only hand them over and watch the kid having fun scrolling through your address book. By the time Nathan was a toddler, he could watch Elmo on long flights. Now, Seth has at his fingertips a half-dozen apps made specifically to keep toddlers occupied in such situations.

Some of the apps even claim to be educational. Which helps with the guilt, because this time, the Mother Theresa-type commented at the end of post that we mothers “Shouldn’t expect these airplane rides to be like the ones you took before kids, when you could kick back and read a magazine. Cross-country flights are time to form a special bond with your child.” As we said in the ‘80s, gag me with a spoon.

4) OK, now that that’s out of my system, a question. Several times over the past few weeks, Jon and I have been awakened from our work-induced mid-day trance by the sound of fireworks. Not just a few fireworks, a LOT of fireworks – sometimes ten minutes or more. What gives? I’m kind of doubting they’re in honor of groundhog day (although there’s enough minor holidays with major celebrations I guess I wouldn’t be surprised). Any ideas?

Kids and computers

Two stories, both mostly true:

1) Funny exchange yesterday with a child who wishes to remain anonymous:

Child, observing Mommie checking Facebook on her iPhone: Mommie! Don’t look at Facebook! It’s dangerous! People could say they’re 16 and really be 46!

Mommie: But I am 46. Practically, anyway. Am I dangerous to myself?

Child: NO NO NO. There’s dangerous people on Facebook! REALLY!

Mommie: OMG, your comments are so funny, I have to post them.

Child: NO NO NO NO. I’m taking away your iPhone!

And the child proceeded to pry it out of my fingers.

The good news here is that the above proves that this particular child is comprehending and absorbing all the Spanish-language “Informatica” (computer) lessons imparted by the school. The bad news is that this child already acts like a 46-year-old helicopter parent.

[NB: My other funny story of this ilk is from when we had a child in Brackett Kindergarten. Kindergarten is apparently the year the Arlington Public Schools teaches children about the dangers of alcohol and drugs, because when I came home from work one day, I was treated to a lecture on the evils of having a glass of wine.]

2) Child who wishes to remain anonymous #2's comment today:

"Mommie, iTunes sells music for both Macs AND Windows. So be very careful!"

Whether this was a comment on Mommie's computer skills or the evils of Windows-based products, I'm not exactly sure.